Dungeon Diary: TSA Christmas Carol

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Anonymous said...: Twas the night before Christmas, everyone was crying (even the mouse),
before we go flying, we must leave the house.
Objectors were molested by the blue-gloved pervs,
I wanted to say no, but I lacked the nerve.

The children were probed, it's etched in their minds,
but better than being left far behind.
They searched mamma, not once but twice,
they squeezed my sack, it didn't feel nice.

Outside the gate, there arose such a clatter,
I zipped up my pants, and went to see what was the matter.
Out of the aquarium I flew like a flash,
and removed the blue glove, which they had left, half-shoved up my ass.

There a screener had her hand on grandma's breast,
I thought this depravity deserves arrest.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
perversion most foul - way worse than just queer.

Molesting an old man, who was screaming it was sick,
I knew at that moment, the TSA guy had just grabbed his dick.
No more rapid than snails, the searches all the same,
then, of course, they called us back by name.

Now, traveler, take off your shoe,
we claim to protect you from terrorists, not that we really do.
With security theater, and Soviet tactics, too,
Really, it's just to compel obedience, that we do what we do.; 7:11 PM